A conversation with a young TRPer about oneitis

I figured it might be cool to save this.  Maybe I can extract some info from here an turn it into a good article.
The goal was to get his baseline proper.  I don’t think any girl is going to like a guy that doesn’t take care of himself.  Girls like guys that are tough of both body and mind, and this kid was trapped.  I think if he does all the shit I recommend he’ll become harder as a man and will eventually get his head out of his ass regarding females.  No respectable girl will bang him in his current condition, but I don’t think it will take long for him to break out of it.  I like to think of it like a maslow’s hierarchy of sexual interaction.  He can’t get better, until he ditches the oneitis.  It is a giant roadblack.

1:07 PM @physt IT is very profitable but it is also a giant trap for dudes. It’s about as far from being a medieval warlord as you can get.
1:07 PM @physt so your masculinity dwindles down to an effiminate gay frog level.
1:07 PM womz2004 the first thing u gotta do is stop being a cuck at work, start there and move to friends, then to females
1:07 PM taiino Nigga what @alpharabbit
1:07 PM  womz2004 (webchat@ was kicked by @physt: I’m talking here nigga damn
1:07 PM jotenko lolol
1:08 PM alpharabbit not fat, but girls who are curvy in the classical sense turn me on
1:08 PM Abattoir lol
1:08 PM penumbra lol who was that guy, what shit advice
1:08 PM @physt Abattoir: OK so the first thing we have to do is add some struggle into your life.
1:08 PM alpharabbit but like i said maybe its because i havent really had a taste of the GOOD shit yet
1:08 PM @physt real men struggle, fake as weak bitches have pampered western IT lives.
1:08 PM Channel mode set to +m by @Q

1:08 PM @Anteros ok
1:08 PM @physt anteros++
1:08 PM @TRPbot anteros’s karma is now 198
1:09 PM @physt flipping the switch of death
1:09 PM @Anteros only voiced/op users can speak now
1:09 PM +Abattoir I don`t understand what that means…
1:09 PM @Anteros we’ll remove this shortly
1:09 PM @physt Abattoir: So right now do you do any sort of physical activity?
1:10 PM +Abattoir I go for walks sometimes but no sports or gym or anything like that
1:11 PM @physt ok so all the recommendations I’m going to make to you are a part of changing your daily “system”.
1:11 PM @physt and step 1 is we need to up your physical activity
1:11 PM @physt EVERY DAY
1:11 PM @physt and I recommend you go to the gym.
1:11 PM @physt This is not to build muscle or anything. It’s to struggle and suffer
1:11 PM  eroksan joined (~er0ks4n@eroksan.users.quakenet.org)
1:12 PM @physt So after we are done talking, locate a gym close to you and get a membership.
1:12 PM @physt I don’t care what program you do, as long as it is every single day.
1:12 PM +Abattoir Yeah that makes sense. WHat doesn`t kill you makes you stronger etc right?
1:12 PM @physt ok step 2. let’s talk about your fatness levels. How fat are you?
1:13 PM +Abattoir quite skinny actually, believe it or not
1:13 PM @physt I do believe it, that’s great.
1:14 PM +Abattoir ^_^
1:14 PM @physt But I want you to change your diet so that you are experiencing more hunger. I want you to eat one meal per day, at approximately the same time each day.
1:14 PM @physt weather that is lunch or dinner depends on your career actually.
1:14 PM +Abattoir How big a meal?
1:14 PM @physt If it is important to have lunch with your coworkers as part of job advancement then do lunch. If it isn’t then do dinner.
1:15 PM @physt just 1 normal sized meal like you would normally have. Do not concern yourself with carbs or calories or anything. And when you are full, stop eating.
1:15 PM @physt don’t seek out any specific foods. Just eat what a normal human would.
1:15 PM +Abattoir Well, okay. How does all this suffering help me get better with women though?
1:16 PM @physt first learn stand, then learn fly
1:17 PM @physt ok so regarding the gym and your diet. Those 2 must be adhered to every single day, period. No “cheat days” or any bullshit like that. No “rest days” either. Every single day you spend at least 1 hour at the gym.
1:17 PM @physt I don’t care what you do, but the harder it is, the better it will be for you. Never miss a day
1:17 PM Channel mode set to +c by @Q
1:17 PM @physt ok next. How much sleep do you get each night?
1:18 PM +Abattoir 5 hours, give or take.
1:19 PM @physt ok I want you to get the same amount of sleep each night. Pick a bed time and stick to it like clockwork.
1:19 PM @physt no matter what, I want you in bed with your eyes closed at the same time each night
1:19 PM @physt you pick the time.
1:20 PM +Abattoir Well okay. I find it kind of difficult to fall asleep a lot of the time bt I`ll try!
1:20 PM @physt Let’s talk about a couple tips for falling asleep.
1:20 PM @physt sleepgainz?
1:20 PM @TRPbot sleepgainz: http://pastebin.com/AQMqXSN6 by cg–
1:21 PM @physt our buddy wrote a good article on this. But it boils down to a couple things in my mind.
1:21 PM @physt 1. Ditch all the blue lights an hour before bed time. Weather that is with glasses or just by removing it in general.
1:21 PM @physt 2. Ditch all stimulants in the evening.
1:21 PM @physt 3. Doing hard ass work in the gym to burn off your excessive energy.
1:22 PM @physt 4. This leads into my next bit.
1:22 PM +Abattoir I`ll keep those in mind
1:22 PM @physt Ok so since you are going to be changing up your entire life here, you are going to be stressing yourself out.
1:23 PM @physt So what I want you to do is setup a google calendar and put all your time in it. If you decide to do gym in the morning, put it on your calendar. If you decide the evening put it at the time you plan to go.
1:23 PM  womz2004 quit (webchat@ Signed off
1:23 PM @physt Put your meal on the calendar
1:23 PM @physt put your work on the calendar and your bedtime, and the 1 hour before bedtime that you ditch the blue light.
1:23 PM @physt you can even use your work calendar that has your IT shit on it.
1:24 PM +Abattoir This seems like a lot of work…
1:24 PM @physt just so long as that calendar chirps at you when you need to do something.
1:24 PM @physt nah it’ll take you 5 minutes
1:24 PM @physt just set it up to repeat each day
1:24 PM @physt use google calendar or something like that.
1:24 PM @physt recurring events or whatever they are called
1:25 PM @physt ok let’s talk about your video games. I want you playing video games in a different way now.
1:25 PM +Abattoir WHat do you mean?
1:26 PM @physt each night I want you playing video games for exactly 1 hour, and 20 minutes. No more, no less.
1:26 PM @physt and never during the 1 hour before bedtime
1:26 PM @physt exactly 1 hour and 20 minutes.
1:26 PM @physt what game are you playing?
1:27 PM +Abattoir it varies tbh. been enjoying Sonic Mania lately
1:27 PM @physt 1 sec.
1:27 PM @physt ok excellent that is a great game for this.
1:28 PM @physt ok so play the game like this:
1:28 PM @physt make sure you are starting at exactly the time on your calendar you have allocated for this. I want you to play the holy shit out of that game. I want you so fucking good at this game that you amaze people.
1:29 PM @physt and I want you to play up until the very second 1 hour 20 minutes is over.
1:29 PM @physt and I want you ONLY playing that sonic game. NO OTHERS.
1:29 PM @physt and you need to play it with zero distractions. Shut off your phone. no extra music or anything else.
1:30 PM @physt ok so let’s do a quick recap. Calendar, 1 meal per day, gym every single day, sleep same time each night, no blue light 1 hour before sleep.
1:31 PM @physt you crystal clear with all that?
1:31 PM +Abattoir Yeah, that seems reaosnable
1:31 PM +Abattoir WHy no blue light specifically though?
1:32 PM @physt blue light tricks your body into thinking it’s still daytime, so it is harder to fall asleep.
1:32 PM +Abattoir Oh, clever.
1:32 PM @physt yeah buddy, we’re smart like that up in here.
1:32 PM +Abattoir maybe I should look at red light instead haha
1:32 PM @physt sleepglasses?
1:33 PM @physt those actually work very very well at blocking blue light.
1:33 PM @physt ok so you got all that stuff.
1:33 PM @physt and you are starting as soon as possible. Tonight even.
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1:33 PM @physt SO… now that you ahve all this information
1:34 PM @physt Let’s tlak about girls
1:34 PM @physt ah yes, those strange wondrous creatures
1:34 PM @physt well, they aren’t strange or wondrous or anything. They are just girls.
1:35 PM +Abattoir Haha. I`d be lying if I said I understood them
1:35 PM @physt well you are in the right place, because we all understand them pretty damned well.
1:35 PM +Abattoir They seem pretty wonderous to me..
1:35 PM  Xagan quit (webchat@host86-155-173-208.range86-155.btcentralplus.com) Signed off
1:35 PM @physt and the first thing that weirds them out is when you think of them as strange wondrous creatures.
1:35 PM  Xagan joined (webchat@host86-155-173-208.range86-155.btcentralplus.com)
1:36 PM @physt from now on they are just meat bags like you and me, except they don’t have as much upperbody strength.
1:36 PM +Abattoir That seems a little reductive…
1:36 PM @physt holy shit, you ARE paying attention
1:36 PM @physt GOOOOOOOOD
1:37 PM @physt it is intentionally reductive so you don’t shoot yourself in the damned foot
1:37 PM +Abattoir Was that a test?
1:38 PM +Abattoir I guess you`re right. I mean, women are people. No one gets anywhere by treating another person like garbage, right?
1:38 PM @physt Here’s the problem with your thinking on women. You thinking that girls are wondrous creatures yaddda yadda, entitles them to you without them having done a shred of anything to deserve you.
1:38 PM @physt you are a cool guy, why on earth should they simply deserve you by existing?
1:39 PM +Abattoir Well that`s not really how I think in fairness
1:39 PM @physt I dunno man, you are “crushing on someone” right now right?
1:40 PM +Abattoir Well yeah but idk it`s not a completely empty crush. We`re friends – not super close, but friends – and I really like her personality.
1:41 PM @physt ok so you will need to get that nonsense out of your brain as soon as possible.
1:41 PM @physt and here is how you are going to do it.
1:41 PM @physt Here is your last daily activity.
1:41 PM @physt it’s a combo
1:41 PM +Abattoir wait why is that nonsense
1:42 PM @physt you are focusing on a girl that doesn’t like you at the expense of your whole life.
1:42 PM @physt and it has to stop now
1:42 PM +Abattoir How do you know she doesn`t like me?
1:42 PM @physt “not super close” <– If she liked you, you’d have banged already.
1:42 PM @physt she’s not interested
1:43 PM @physt there is nothing about you that makes her tingle in her lady parts
1:43 PM +Abattoir Well I don`t think that`s necessarily true, what if she feels the same but is too nervous to say anything as wel
1:43 PM @physt oh, it’s true
1:43 PM +Abattoir well*
1:43 PM @physt girls don’t have the same problems us guys do.
1:43 PM @physt they can fuck anyone they want.
1:44 PM @physt if that girl came up to you and said “hey Abattoir let’s go back to my place and make out” you’d fucking do it and you know it.
1:44 PM +Abattoir Maybe in a sense but isn`t that a bit of a generalisation?
1:44 PM @physt she wouldn’t have to say a damned thing besides that either
1:44 PM +Abattoir girls can experience being shy and nervous as well, no? They`re humans
1:44 PM @physt Abattoir: not like you can
1:44 PM @physt girls are a much much different animal
1:44 PM @physt SO… here is what you need to do
1:44 PM +Abattoir I don`t understand, I`m sorry.
1:45 PM @physt girls and boys are vastly different. Each one has their own issues and problems my friend.
1:45 PM @physt they seem to stop teaching that in the schools apparently.
1:45 PM @physt so anyways here is your final life change.
1:45 PM @physt It is 2 parts.
1:46 PM @physt 1. You will NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES talk to this girl unless she talks to you first.
1:46 PM @physt PERIOD
1:46 PM @physt This is critical
1:46 PM @physt and 2. You will talk to 5 female humans per day other than her.
1:46 PM +Abattoir But, I like talking to her.
1:46 PM @physt I’m not saying to hit on them, I’m not saying to strike out with them or whatever. Just have a short (or long) conversation about anything.
1:47 PM +Abattoir That just sounds like a dick move.
1:47 PM @physt your life depends on it
1:47 PM +Abattoir DOes it really though? I Won`t die if I talk to her
1:47 PM @physt ok let me paint a picture for you.
1:48 PM @physt You are focused on this girl and she doesn’t like you. You think she does, but you are wrong. So you neglect talking to other females. 5 years from now, you get up the courage to ask her out, she says no. You have lost 5 years of your life.
1:48 PM @physt Your life literally depends on this.
1:49 PM +Abattoir MAybe I should just ask her out now…
1:49 PM +Abattoir get it over with, even if she rejects me
1:49 PM @physt so I can sense everyone in channel listening to us getting enraged at the thought of “asking a girl out”
1:49 PM +Abattoir I`d be okay with just being friends.
1:50 PM +Abattoir THe closure is more important
1:50 PM @physt why?
1:50 PM +Abattoir Because the uncertainty would be maddening
1:50 PM @physt I can tell you for certain she doesn’t see you as a viable candidate for sex.
1:50 PM @physt there, now you don’t have to
1:50 PM +Abattoir how can you know that for sure
1:50 PM +Abattoir you don`t know her, you`re not in her head
1:51 PM @physt this is going to be really hard for you to come to terms with.
1:51 PM @physt and I get it
1:51 PM @physt you’ve pumped her up inside your head so high that the mere thought of her not liking you makes your own stomach hurt.
1:52 PM +Abattoir You`re generalising again, that`s not really the case.
1:52 PM +Abattoir YEah I`d be disappointed if she rejected me but you know, that`s life
1:52 PM @physt I’m right and deep down inside, you know it. You can attempt to argue with me about it all you like.
1:52 PM +Abattoir I can`t accept that. I know how I feel.
1:53 PM @physt I’ve advised you to never speak to this girl on purpose. This advice is critical to your well being. I am really fucking good at this, and you should take what I say very seriously.
1:53 PM @physt you are in this channel for a reason
1:53 PM @physt 1. Never speak to her on purpose. 2. Talk to 5 human females per day.
1:54 PM +Abattoir But you haven`t given me a reason as to why this will work, you`ve just told me to do it
1:54 PM +Abattoir I`m sorry I`m being difficult but it`s hard for me
1:55 PM @physt the reason is you are a fucking retard with oneitis for a girl. It’s making you really fucking stupid and offputting. Most men in here are disgusted by you. But i’m being kind and giving you advice so that you will fucking listen.
1:55 PM @physt because you definitely won’t listen if people just yell at you.
1:56 PM @physt if I unmute this channel right now these guys will tear your head off
1:56 PM @physt oneitis?
1:56 PM @TRPbot oneitis: https://youtu.be/uZeR-vxREvw When a guy has fallen in love with a woman in the same way a boy loves his mother. He obsesses about her, but she does not reciprocate. Love is a drug, and your dumbass got addicted to one supplier.
1:56 PM +Abattoir Well, why? I`m asking honest questions
1:56 PM @physt that is literally what you have
1:56 PM @physt and it is ruining you.
1:56 PM +Abattoir But… that`s not what I have? I don`t obsess over her
1:56 PM @physt you are in an IRC channel asking about her man.
1:56 PM @physt that in and of itself proves it
1:57 PM +Abattoir Well.. I guess that`s a fair point but how can I know she doesn`t reciprocate if I haven`t asked her about it?
1:57 PM +Abattoir WHy is manipulating her better than being honest?
1:57 PM @physt you aren’t manipulating anything. You are protecting yourself from yourself.
1:58 PM @physt in reality oneitis ruins men
1:58 PM @physt we normally advise people to break off all contact period.
1:58 PM @physt which is what I SHOULD advise you to do, but i’m guessing she is some kind of what coworker?
1:58 PM @physt friend of a friend?
1:59 PM +Abattoir I`m on a part time course at college and she`s a classmate.
2:01 PM @physt my advice stands. I’m going to unmute this channel and my god have mercy on your soul. If you do everything I’ve said for a month without missing a single day, we will be happy to provide further tweaks to your day.
2:01 PM @physt you are very far behind for your age. So I really suggest you take this all seriously.
2:01 PM +Abattoir Well, thank you for taking the time to help me. Sorry if I disrupted the chat..
2:01 PM @physt you’ve made the chat better actaully
2:01 PM +Abattoir THing is like, I don`t wanna lose her as a friend. I feel like if I ghost her that would be a dick move
2:02 PM +Abattoir And even beyond the crush thing I still think she`s a good person
2:02 PM @physt yep, you’re screwed

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